Certainly it is an exalting experience to reach orgasm together, at the same moment. It is something all couples should strive for. It requires a degree of self-control on the man’s part that is hard to achieve, to hold back his own orgasm until his partner’s orgasm is imminent. To a lesser extent, the woman can try to shorten her plateau phase.
Simultaneous orgasm demands an effort from both partners, then. But any effort of this kind lessens the possibility of concentrating on one’s own pleasure.
This leads many couples to aim not for simultaneous orgasm but alternate orgasm, allowing each in turn to let themselves go, concentrating on their own pleasure and savouring it to the full. This is what happens with oral sex – fellatio and cunnilingus – when continued right to orgasm.
Sexual intercourse must of course be a two-way affair. Only relations with prostitutes are one-way relationships, and this largely explains the disappointment men almost always feel after visiting a prostitute, even as a rare occasion.